just laura

I’m super tired but have some direction, finally. Will post more soon…

Charles and I are both making a commitment to exercise and better health, so it was suggested we blog about it to help keep each other accountable. Done. Yesterday I went to Gold’s Gym and did cardio. :)

I’ve been super busy lately… more of those weeks where every night is scheduled well in advance and many nights have 2 or more events.

Last Wed and Thurs were hanging with Jess, helping her pack for San Francisco (I miss Jess!). Last Thursday was another doctor’s appointment (good news) and lunch with Maggie (never happens nearly enough… I love Maggie). Thursday night was also last minute unpacking, cleaning, hanging pics, and getting rid of boxes. I ended up taking the whole day off of work to do the drs appt, run errands, grocery shop, see Jess, and do apt stuff. Was lovely!

Last Friday was my housewarming and it was fun to have people over in my space, fun seeing my friends mingle with old folks, and fun to see them meet new folks. There was a good crowd, crowded but not packed, loud but not loud enough to get a noise complaint from the neighbors. We even ended up with an excess of wine (cool!) and with some good books for the bookshelf. Many folks got to meet M, others got to meet Lee for the first time, and others got to connect familiar faces. In the small world category… it seems Duff made out with my roomie’s old roomie back in Italy in 1999 or 2000 and recognized my roomie now 7 years later. Why doesn’t that surprise me more? Friday was also date night and, as we know, it’s always fun to see M.

Saturday was the Urban Craft Uprising with Jen, Kimbra, Deanna, Rod, Clare, and Ally. As expected, we were all tempted by cute but expensive cool crafty things. I ended up with a uterus coin purse (it’s one of a kind!) and a necklace (inspiring). Kim ended up with tastie pasties, among other things. Jen resisted the cutest vinyl purse ever, and Deanna walked away with clove soap. I even ran into Beth, formerly of blogger fame. Her site’s been down for a while, but it was fun to see her, especially as she’s a vendor selling cute baby stuff. So great! Can’t wait till I find out if Angelica’s kids will be boys or girls! Oh, and I also ran into Maria, one of our YVC teenage volunteers. Only now she’s graduated from HS, graduated from college, did a year of AmeriCorps, and is now applying for her MSW. So great! So proud! So crazy to see her grown up and remember that 7 years kind of is a long time. Oh, and the best part of Saturday… it SNOWED! Yay snow! Lots of big, wet, fluffy snow! It seemed to start in the city around 1pm and just continued on and off all the rest of the day and night. So fun! Totally makes me giddy, as silly as that is. :)

Saturday night was another date night (so soon!) and a good time was had by all. We went shopping, walked around downtown, and had a fabulous seafood dinner at The Oceanaire. M generally seems to pamper me and we’ve eaten at some very lovely places lately. But oh my goodness… I was blown away by my black and blue blackened mahi mahi with blue cheese and caramelized onions. It was just outstanding. After the maytag blue cheese at Thanksgiving, I’ve kind of been craving blue cheese. It was the perfect choice for the night and was a lovely addition to a lovely date.

Lest I forget to appreciate some of the places M generously takes me:
* http://www.theoceanaire.com – “As sleek as a 1930s ocean liner, yet as relaxed as a dinner on the shore, the Oceanaire provides the perfect setting to enjoy Ultra-Fresh seafood, flown in daily from around the world.”
* http://www.nishinorestaurant.com – “Pure Japanese with innovative American touches. The results are artful, often dazzling.”
* http://www.bokaseattle.com – “urban american cuisine, handcrafted cocktails, new and old world wines”
* http://veilrestaurant.com – “Fresh ingredients from local farmers pair with the worldly expertise of Chef Galusha for food that is original, intense, exciting and creative. Galusha’s Progressive American cuisine, alongside a world-class wine list puts Veil in a league of its own and is raising the culinary bar in the Northwest.”

Sunday was the big photo shoot I’ve been organizing. Day two of snow kept a few photographers and a few models away, but we still had an excellent turn out (more than 10 models and more than 10 photographers!). I think a good time was had by all. Thank goodness I have many generous friends who were willing to model, who were willing to mentor, who were willing to loan space, and photographers who were willing to bring lighting equipment and backdrops. I even had lots of donated coffee and donuts for the event. It was seriously fun for me to be there in the beginning of the day and I was sad to have to leave early. I was a reluctant organizer, but as always, I still had a great time doing it. :)

Charles says I like teasers, but really truly, I’ve just felt busy and tired lately. Here’s the promised update on direction. :) Alyssa and Beal say “I wish I’d known. I always read the blog but miss a post here or there.” No worries, y’all. I haven’t really posted on any of this yet. It’s been painful (and sometimes emotional), and has been largely without direction, so I’ve waited till direction. Now I have direction, so here’s a long catch up post. Enjoy!

Back in October I was in a ton of pain, went to the doctor, went to the hospital, had ultrasounds, talked to a radiologist, talked to my doctor, and was diagnosed with uterine fibroids. What are fibroids, you might ask?

Fibroids are benign tumors which grow from the muscle layers of the uterus. Fibroids may affect about 30% of women during the reproductive years. Uterine fibroids often do not require treatment, but when they are problematic, they may be treated surgically or with medicationThe symptoms depend on the size, location, number, and the pathological findings. Fibroids, particularly when small, may be entirely asymptomatic. Generally, symptoms relate to the location of the lesion and its size. Important symptoms include abnormal gynecologic hemorrhage, pain, urinary frequency or retention, and in some cases, infertility. During pregnancy they may be the cause of miscarriage, bleeding, premature labor, or interference with the position of the fetus.

Fibroids may require treatment in the following circumstances:
1. Fibroids are growing large enough to cause pressure on other organs, such as the bladder.
2. Fibroids are growing rapidly
3. Fibroids are causing abnormal bleeding
4. Fibroids are causing problems with fertility.

I have five fibroids, they are large, and they’re definitely causing problems. They’ve also been extremely painful and have come with many of the above mentioned complications.

OPTION 1: I went to a recommended surgeon (Dr Welch) after I was diagnosed to find out what I needed to do. He said hysterectomy was the safest, healthiest option. But he also told me even if I had the less invasive myomectomy (bikini line incision through my abdomen just to remove the fibroids instead of the entire uterus) I’d still be “highly unlikely” to ever have kids. Let’s be honest. That was pretty scary to hear. Oh, and he told me I’d be out of work for 6 weeks recovering. That wasn’t appealing either. Strike one.

OPTION 2: Needless to say, I was in pain, I was emotional, and I wasn’t sure what to do so I decided to find another recommended surgeon for a second opinion. This one (Dr H Miller) was head of OBgyn at Swedish and his bedside manner instilled much greater confidence in me. He’s an expert in laparoscopic myomectomy (the minimally invasive option where they go in with small cuts and tiny cameras instead of cutting you wide open). This option has a mere 2 week recovery time instead of 6 weeks and he also said it shouldn’t affect my fertility. Whoa! Total 180 degree change in info, eh? This doctor does them all the time, told me I qualified, and said I should do it soon as mine were large and if they got much larger they’d be too big to operate on laparoscopically. I like him tons, but very sadly he didn’t have operating room for until Feb. Lame! It’s the catch-22 of the medical world. You want a highly rated doctor who instills a sense of confidence b/c you have a major pressing problem, but the highly rated ones are very popular and can’t see you for months which isn’t too helpful if you have a pressing problem. After waiting a month I was able to slip into a last minute appointment, but surgery was still going to mean waiting an even longer amount of time. Strike two.

OPTION 3: So I went to my third option… finding an OBgyn in Austin where my parents live. I figured if I was going to be out for 4-6 weeks, I could maybe do it over the holidays to reduce my total time gone from work. So, I found the highest rated OBgyn in Austin (Dr Seeker) and talked to the nurse over last weekend. I convinced her to let me sneak my way into a last minute appointment and she said come in on Monday. I booked my ticket, flew out on Sunday (missing my photo shoot and giving up my Sonics tickets), and had my appointment on Monday. I flew back Wednesday night and here’s my update.

The third surgeon was not so negative as dr #1, but also not so upbeat as dr #2. Instead, he was rather in the middle. I don’t need the full incision, but will need a mid-size one. “A laparotomy an incision is made in the abdomen to reach the uterus. The advantage of this is that large myomas can be quickly removed. The disadvantage of a laparotomy is that it requires an abdominal incision. Most patients who have this procedure spend two nights in the hospital, and return to work in about four weeks.” He was also in the middle on fertility… said there’s a “good chance” I could have kids someday. Whew! Not sure if I do want kids, but being told I couldn’t have them was still scary.

So there we go. I’m happy to at least have direction about what’s going to happen and super excited to have surgery scheduled (Dec 20th in Austin) so I know when the pain should stop, when they’ll come out, and when the recovery process can begin. It’s not 6 weeks, not 2 weeks, but maybe somewhere in the middle around 3 or 4 weeks. And it’s not a full cut, just a mid-size in addition to the small laproscopic cuts. Not exactly the best news, especially since I’ll get the surgery and be out for my b-day, xmas, and new years, but I guess it feels reasonable. Wish me luck! Send me thoughts of warm cookies, cheesy movies, and quick recoveries!

Hi all, Thanks for the well wishes, calls, emails, and even offers to fly to Austin and visit! Many of you also requested my parents address and/or favorite type of cookies. Hopefully that is for xmas cards or personal trivia fun, not actually for gifts. The request was for well wishes, not for actually sending me movies and cookies. My first two weeks of recovering will be at my parents place so they’ll be responsible for keeping me comfy and well fed. Besides… too many cookies means what I lose in fibroid weight I’d just gain back in cookie weight, and that would be no good.

On a related note, I announced the surgery to my team on Friday and many of the girls came over instantly to be supportive and tell me their own mothers’ struggles with fibroids. Seems it’s not something people normally talk about but once it’s brought up it brings awareness. Not that awareness helps since it’s genetic, but still nice to get additional insight into other women’s lives who’ve had them and had surgery.

Random fibroid related story of the day: On Saturday evening I met a woman at M’s house who’d had a fibroid removed when she was 34. She wanted a hysterectomy (she didn’t want kids), but the doctor refused. She was told she’d never be able to have kids anyway (b/c of the surgery) and so she never took birth control again. While more fibroids grew after her surgery, they’re now beginning to shrink as she’s 45 and nearing menopause. The fibroids shrank so much she actually got pregnant at age 45 and had a healthy baby a few months ago. Crazy. Good to know they will indeed shrink closer to menopause, that there’s still a chance at fertility, and have a good reminder to always use birth control, regardless of surgery, if you’re not planning for kids.

Oh, and the same woman was telling me she tried to go back to work two weeks after her surgery (she had bikini line incision myomectomy) and said two weeks wasn’t enough time to recover. She said trying to go back in was a “big mistake” and that she ended up taking more time off after all. Hearing that was a wake up call for me. I might be in denial about what a 3-4 week recovery time means. I booked my flight so I’ll fly home to Seattle 10 days after the surgery and am hoping to be somewhat mobile, able to drive, maybe work half days, etc. Hearing Lisa’s stories, it makes me remember to just take each day as it comes. I like to think I’m young and pretty healthy, so I hope recovery will come quickly. If it doesn’t, I just need to listen to my body, give it time, and hope for the best.

Thanks again for the warm wishes! Hope y’all are well!

Just found this list of books from Dec 2005 that I meant to read. I tend to forget by the time I get to the book store or library website, so I’m jotting some of them down now before I forget.

• Let them eat ketchup – a book about poverty in US
• Hip Hop Nation
• Bowling Alone
• The Trials of Joseph
• Atomic Farm Girl
• a simpler way (Wheatley)
• Leadership and the New Science (Margaret Wheatley)
• The Corner – I once owned it, but didn’t finish it

Sundi recommends:

• Abandon the river by N S Niepool
• White Teeth by Zadie Smith

Samantha recommends:

• “Disgrace” by Coetzee, which is about a teacher in South Africa. – read it in Kenya
• “A Bend in the River” by V.S. Naipaul, which happens in India.
• “Black Rain” by Ibuse, which is about the aftermath of the atomic bomb in Japan and how difficult it was for women with radiation sickness to marry.
• Kundera’s “Incredible Lightness of Being” which takes place during the Prague Spring – read it in Kenya

Cindy recommends:

• the famished road
• small wonder
• light in august
• guns, germs & steel (also a Pete recommendation)
• the ballad of the sad cafe – read it in Kenya
• the violent bear it away
• mars and her children
• love is a dog from hell
• the god of small things (Andrew gave me his copy)

Sam recommends:

• bell hooks – transformation/education

JD recommends:

• BelCanto

I came to the realization this morning that there’s no possible way I can get caught up with work stuff before I leave. Health comes first, I know, but I still don’t like feeling incompetent/feeling like a slacker/letting things slide. Beyond work, life is just busy, and I feel swamped from 7am to 11pm. Arg. Not bad stuff, just busy life. And I definitely haven’t been to the gym since returning from Austin last week. Lame. On the bright side, lots of good stuff happening too:

• Last Monday was doctor’s visit in Austin, followed by dinner with Charlie, Stef, and Gus.
• Last Tuesday was errands, followed by dinner with Chris, Alyssa, and Charles, followed by drinks with Beal and Hanna.
• Last Wednesday was flying home to Seattle, followed by hanging out w/ M.
• Last Thursday was David’s theater event w/ Susie, Jim, and Maggie at the Tractor.
• Friday was another great dinner (this time at Lark) with M, Leo, and Meagan, followed by Alyssa’s theater event at the Odd Fellows Hall, then drinks at the Satellite.
• Saturday was sewing with Samantha, then lunch with Angelica, and then Sean & Ruth’s holiday party (great to see them after two years, great meal, funny gift exchange, and fun to see C-E, Paige, and Jenny). Saturday was also former roomie Erin’s bday which I very sadly had to miss.
• In addition to all of that, Saturday was also two very fun parties with M that lasted till the wee hours and completely tired me out.
• Sunday was brunch at Rod’s and Santa shopping and dinner at the Treehouse.
• Monday was Maggie’s birthday celebration (yay!) at Black Bottle with Jim, Susie, Kerry, Nancy, Savitha, Duff, Jeff, Dr David, James, and Alica. Eventually left Belltown to have hang out time with M.
• Tonight I’m canceling my evening plans, chatting with Suzan, and probably working late trying to get caught up before leaving for out of town yet another time. I’m tired just thinking about it.

Lovely Suzan called today, angry about me keeping my fibroids to myself, wanting to do anything she can to help. Among other generous offers, she suggested I talk to her father in law (an obgyn surgeon). So I called Charlie in NYC and he thinks the laparotomy (belly incision) really is unnecessary and that a good surgeon should be able to it laproscopically (with a camera and the three tiny incisions). That was the same thing my favorite surgeon in Seattle said, but unfortunately he’s not available for a while. Arg. Charlie thinks maybe 40-50 doctors in the US are good enough to do it laproscopically and avoid the bigger incision, and that if I can’t get in with one of them, the laparotomy is reasonable. It just means, in his words, that it’ll be “much more painful and require a longer recovery period.” Lame! I’m not really interested in settling for second best when it comes to my health and my time holed up after surgery, but unfortunately that seems to be the direction I’m heading. On the bright side, Charlie said he’d ask around his surgeon friends and see if they can recommend someone in Houston who’d be better. Of course, who knows if I could get in sooner in Houston, for a consultation and surgery, before my surgery on Dec 20th. Oh, the fibroid fun just continues. (What I really want to write is “Dammit! This sucks!” then I want to curl up on the couch and have a good cry. Sadly, that doesn’t help me or anyone else really, so we’ll just move on for the night. No use getting stressed. It’s not good or bad, it just is. Arg).

One of my coworkers came up to me after the management team meeting today and said “I have fibroids too. I was in surgery in October.”

Tonight at our work holiday party she told me her story. She’s 50 and elected to have the embolization done to restrict blood to the fibroids so they’ll slowly shrink. She opted for embolization because within a few years she’ll hit menopause and they’ll shrink even more and even quicker. She had two weeks in bed for recovery time after the procedure and is doing great now. In the six weeks since the procedure, her fibroids have shrunk so much she’s already down an entire pants size. Impressive, eh?

Suzan and I were joking that maybe I would be thinner once the surgery is done, and who knows, with this news, maybe I will be! I currently weigh more than I ever have and wear the largest pant size I ever have. Maybe it’s only partially Kenya weight and maybe some of the weight can be attributed to the giant grapefruit sized fibroids that I’m carrying around in my belly. :) I wonder if the doctor can size and weigh them for me (and maybe snap a picture)? I admit I’m a bit morbidly curious…

Here are a few quick pictures from Sean & Ruth’s holiday party last Saturday night. It was fun to see them after so long, but sad when people asked how we knew each other. Every time I explain the Sunday Dinner at Yellow House phenomenon, everyone always responds with “Oh, that sounds so great! I wish we did that!” And then I say “I wish we still did it to…” Alas. It was good times while it lasted. :)

Last night was my holiday party with CCGS where I ate way too many fried artichokes and much too much feta. I didn’t win any door prizes, but I do love a nice fireplace in a cozy bar. :) Last night was also the Dec photo meetup, which I arrived at a wee bit late. Ben greeted me as his “new best friend!” – super great. John gave me a hug. Jim has lots of ego boosting comments as always. Two people showed pics from Costa Rica (making me want to go back). Everyone wished me well with the surgery. It was a tiring but very nice evening. (Yes, pretty much everything feels tiring lately, that’s just how it works).

Tonight is the Cascadia holiday party. Tomorrow is my AC holiday party for work followed by Rod’s wine and cheese party. Saturday is Jenny’s holiday party and date night with M. Sunday I have brunch plans and dinner plans and then fly home to Austin. Once I come back to Seattle, Maggie says she’ll throw me a belated birthday party in Jan after I’m recovered from surgery, so it seems the party season will continue on a bit longer. Yay socializing!

Seattle’s brand spankin’ new SLUT (South Lake Union Trolley) just made it’s maiden voyage yesterday. It then went out of commission for a few hours when they found an extra part, but it’s back running again.

December 12, 2007

SEATTLE—Seattle’s south Lake Union trolley is now in service, making its maiden run Wednesday between the downtown retail core and the developing area where the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center is located.

The 1.3 mile line has 11 stops where the streetcar passes every 15 minutes. The line cost $52 million for the city to build and it will cost $1.7 million a year for Metro to operate. Rides are free this month. Then the fare will be $1.50.

Among those at the noon-hour sendoff were people wearing T-shirts with the acronym for South Lake Union Trolley or SLUT. Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels said, “I don’t care what you call it as long as you ride it.”

Thursday’s CascadiaFest was fun… I finally met Ann’s cute older brother, saw James for the first time in years, ate goat cheese and a raspberry tart, saw Dieter and Emily and Susie and Duff, and got pulled onto the dance floor to dance with the CEO. Not a bad night! :)

Friday’s socializing was fabulous too… started with lunch with Nitza at the Satay Hut, followed directly by the AC party at J’s house, followed directly by wine with Maggie, Sarah, and Jim, followed directly by Rod’s wine party. I was exhausted by the end of the night and lasted about 10 minutes in my apartment before passing out in my bed.

Today was free Jamba Juice at the new store, silly postage stamps, work for a few hours, and Santarchy all afternoon with my new white wig. (Yay wigs!). Many pics should come sometime soon! For now I’m off to date night and then tomorrow I leave for Austin. I probably won’t get much socializing after my surgery next week, but last week and this week definitely made up for any potential lost time! :)

Two important dates:

Jan 2nd – I return to Seattle and will want socializing with all of my beautiful Seattle friends soon after. Maggie’s made me promise to ask for help, ask for casseroles, etc. I don’t know how many casseroles I’ll be able to eat, but I will try to ask for help when necessary. :)

Mar 1st – Samite, a Ugandan artist we met in Bwindi, is going to be playing in Seattle for one night. He’s played and recorded with Paul Simon and Ladysmith Black Mambazo on separate occasions, has many solo albums, has songs on Putumayo compilations, and has previously done shows in Seattle at the Triple Door. And he’s a stellar guy who’s concerned about human rights organizing. We like him and we’re planning to see him perform in March.

I may find time to post more pics later, but for now, here are a few quick shots from yesterday’s Santarchy in Wallingford!

Many thanks to everyone for the steady stream of phone calls tonight! I’m fine, ready, and willing. Surgery is tomorrow at 1pm and I’ll be home by Friday afternoon. No, I’m not nervous. No, not really scared either. The doctors are the experts and I’m turning my body over to their able hands. I will continue to be optimistic and look forward to a speedy and pain free (ha!) recovery.

Really, y’all, I feel like I’m doing as well as can be expected. However, in my world right now, people very near and dear to me are hurting… surviving abusive relationships, surviving a miscarriage, surviving the loss of a spouse… and my heart go out to them.

My heart goes out to Jack for the loss of his wife Anita. There’s a memorial post on his blog worth checking out… followed by six long pages of comments from people like me who have fond memories of how Anita’s generosity and sense of community touched so many people.

My own two cents worth: Like many others, I first met Anita at a blogger meetup (back in Oct 2002). She was the first person to welcome me, introduce me around, and include me in conversation. A woman after my own heart… she gets major respect for that sense of inclusion. The first night we met we started discussing her crafting and my nonprofit and on the spot she offered me a giant donation of goods for our youth programs. And I mean giant… like maybe 4-5 giant garbage bags taller than my waist, full of craft supplies. So fantastic! I was stunned at her generosity and was so happy to meet up again later that same week! What a beautiful stranger Anita turned out to be! I’ve been thankful to get to know her over the years, at meetups and outside of them (one year she even loaned me a costume piece for my Brides of March outfit and introduced me to that entire crazy scene!). Her welcoming spirit, generosity, humor, and sense of community will be sorely missed. She’s in my thoughts tonight…

And speaking of (unrelated) sadness of an entirely different kind… I can’t believe the Crocodile closed! I think I saw more shows there than anywhere else in town and I’m going to be sad, sad, sad till someone bails them out and opens under new management. C’mon guys… do it for all of us!

Seattle’s Crocodile Cafe, ‘living room’ of grunge, closes

SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/6420ap_wa_crocodile_closed.html

Last updated December 17, 2007 7:22 p.m. PT
By GENE JOHNSON
ASSOCIATED PRESS WRITER

SEATTLE — The Crocodile Cafe, a dingy nightclub that became a second home for Seattle musicians during grunge rock’s heyday, has closed, its booking agent said Monday.

Eli Anderson wrote on the Web site of the weekly newspaper The Stranger that the club’s owner, Stephanie Dorgan, broke the news in a voice mail message over the weekend.

“I also want to reiterate that the Croc’s closure came as a TOTAL SURPRISE to everyone who worked there, myself included,” Anderson wrote. “Obviously if I knew we were going to close I wouldn’t have been putting so much work into securing the Croc a solid spring schedule. I’d like to apologize to any band or agent or promoter who I inadvertently lied to in the past few weeks.”

The announcement sent pangs of panic and nostalgia through the local music scene. Many of Seattle’s most famous bands – from Nirvana and Mudhoney to Modest Mouse and Death Cab for Cutie – played there, and musicians lauded its sound quality, its intimacy and even its food.

“It was the living room of the Seattle music scene,” music writer Charles Cross said. “You would see Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love hanging out there. It was the place that people in the music scene went.”

Dorgan, a former attorney, opened the Crocodile in 1991, but the space had been a concert space for years before that, Cross said. When Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Mudhoney, Soundgarden and other bands exploded nationally, the Croc became a destination for grunge rock pilgrims from around the country.

Details were scant Monday about the future of the building in Seattle’s Belltown neighborhood, which has been booming with upscale condominium construction in recent years. E-mails to the venue were not returned and no phone listing was immediately available for Dorgan. The club’s Web site continued to list bookings through next spring, including a performance by The Decemberists in January.

It was well-known that the Crocodile had been losing money in the face of competition from other clubs. When Dorgan and her former husband – REM guitarist Peter Buck – divorced last year, the court file revealed its troubled finances.

“It was an amazing, vibrant venue for a long time,” said Ben London, who played there several times with his band, Alcohol Funny Car, in the 1990s. “The writing on the wall was when they built the senior center right next door.”
—

http://www.thecrocodile.com/

Guess who just sent me a netflix subscription gift certificate? :) How super fun and timely! It’s sure to make four weeks in bed much, much more enjoyable! Thanks Caroline! Love you lots! Anyone have movie suggestions? I’ve turned the comments on… so send them over!

My fibroid surgery was yesterday… laparotomy (bikini line incision) and hysteroscopy. Look for gross fibroids pics to be posted once I get some scanned in. Dr. Seeker removed 14 fibroids (way more than the 5 originally planned) and found I had endometriosis (and he fixed that too). They say 6 weeks recovery time and despite my previous state of denial, I now think six weeks actually sounds good with the current amount of pain. I spent the night in the hospital and came home today. Yep, I’m alive and feel sore, sore, sore and am in pain, pain, pain. I’m also drugged, drugged, drugged and eagerly anticipating the arrival of my first three netflix movies tomorrow. Beal and Hanna came by the hospital last night (yay!) and Charlie and Stef and Gus are coming by the house tomorrow for my birthday. Mom and Dad have been making sure I eat, drink, and drug, and Dad even made a gluten free b-day cake. Chris and Charles want to bring me a birthday/get well soon lunch from Chuy’s tomorrow as well (love those boys!). Many thanks for all the well wishes, calls, txts, and emails. I love you all lots and am thankful for having you in my life!

Reason #3,294 to love Martha:

For all you folks asking, and for those who say the address they used bounced, here’s an address for the next week or so:

4305 Sam Bass Rd
Round Rock, TX 78681

Sorry I keep moving around so much… wasn’t my intention to avoid getting Christmas cards. Take care!

The birthday yesterday was painful but included a hectic living room full of good people. Chris, Alyssa, the kids Tyler and Quinn. Charles. Charlie and Stef and Gus. Mom and Dad. Me in a bathrobe in a recliner most of the day. :)

Today was “Christmas” and meant Charlie, Stef, and Gus came over again. He wore the hat I got him (he loves finding hats, saying “hat,” carrying around hats, etc… but doesn’t generally love to wear them). He also loved the Little Tykes basketball hoop Mom and Dad found for him. I loved my pink tool box from Mom and Dad and the Gus makeup bag from Charlie and Stef. I also was very thankful for my iPod birthday speakers from Dad and my Imagine vase from Mom. I’m generally all about skipping gifts, but the family hasn’t signed on for that yet. As long as gift giving happens, I’m content to get a few things I like.

As for my uterus, the pain in the mornings seems to be the worst imaginable… it’s when I don’t have enough core strength to raise my upper half from bed, where I don’t have the strength to lower my legs, when I don’t want to move, when I just end up crying and get a wee bit overwhelmed. Tonight I’m setting my alarm so I can wake up and take pain killers to avoid the intense headache, back pain, and body ache of the past few nights. Today I also stopped oozing and started bleeding instead. Lots of bleeding. I was all excited to have finally quit bleeding, but that was apparently too optimistic. Let’s hope it’s normal and let’s hope it stops soon. I’m ready to begin the path to recovery but so far it’s not getting any easier. To kill the time I’ve been fortunate to have friends and family nearby, to have NetFlix on hand to entertain me, lucky to have Stef looking out for me with books and cookies, and lucky for my parents to get my food, drugs, clean me up, and take care of me when I’ve been such a mess. Much love to everyone…

Today the bleeding and pain continued. I’m scheduled to go see the drs tomorrow on Christmas morning to find out what’s happening. Beyond that, life’s not bad. I had a tiny bit of appetite today so that was good. I also read for a while (Alice Sebold’s Lucky), watched some cooking channel shows with Mom, and helped Dad set up wireless on his new laptop. I’m also receiving cards, txts from Mexico, calls from Cairo, and get well gifts from y’all, which is unnecessary but very very sweet. I’m off now to help Dad learn desktop publishing for his new role as editor of the car club’s newsletter. Let’s hear it for an oh so exciting holiday! ;)

I realize I did fibroids 101 a few weeks ago, but didn’t explain endometriosis yet. When they operated on Thursday, they found 14 fibroids (not 5) and found endometriosis as well (on both my uterus and left ovary). Here are the basics:

Endometriosis is a common medical condition characterized by growth of tissue like endometrium, the lining of the uterus, beyond or outside the uterus. In endometriosis, the endometrium (from endo, “inside”, and metra, “womb”) is found to be growing outside the uterus, on or in other areas of the body. Normally, the endometrium is shed each month during the menstrual cycle; however, in endometriosis, the misplaced endometrium is usually unable to exit the body. The endometriotic tissues still detach and bleed, but the result is far different: internal bleeding, degenerated blood and tissue shedding, inflammation of the surrounding areas, pain, and formation of scar tissue may result. In addition, depending on the location of the growths, interference with the normal function of the bowel, bladder, small intestines and other organs within the pelvic cavity can occur. In very rare cases, endometriosis has also been found in the skin, the lungs, the eye, the diaphragm, and the brain.

A major symptom of endometriosis is severe recurring pain. The amount of pain a woman feels is not necessarily related to the extent or stage (1 through 4) of endometriosis. Some women will have little or no pain despite having extensive endometriosis affecting large areas or having endometriosis with scarring. On the other hand, women may have severe pain even though they have only a few small areas of endometriosis.

Symptoms of endometriosis can include (but are not limited to):
* Painful, sometimes disabling menstrual cramps (dysmenorrhea); pain may get worse over time (progressive pain)
* Chronic pain (typically lower back pain and pelvic pain, also abdominal)
* Painful sex (dyspareunia)
* Painful bowel movements (dyschezia) or painful urination (dysuria)
* Heavy menstrual periods (menorrhagia)
* Nausea and vomiting
* Premenstrual or intermenstrual spotting (bleeding between periods)
* Infertility and subfertility. Endometriosis may lead to fallopian tube obstruction. Even without this, there may be difficulty conceiving. In some women, subfertility is the sole symptom, and the endometriosis is only discovered after fertility investigations.
* Bowel obstruction (possibly including vomiting, crampy pain, diarrhea, a rigid and tender abdomen, and distention of the abdomen, depending on where the blockage is and what is causing it) or complete urinary retention.

In addition, women who are diagnosed with endometriosis may have gastrointestinal symptoms that may mimic irritable bowel syndrome, as well as fatigue.

Guess that further explains my unnecessary bleeding and extremely painful periods, and maybe even some fatigue too. No worries though… they found the endometriosis and took care of it while they were in there. No separate work required. I’m hoping to feel 100% better in just six short weeks. :)

Seriously, my friends are the most impressive friends in the whole world! I couldn’t be more proud of Susie and Jacob for their recent interview and article featured on the front page of Fortune Small Business! I’m so, so proud! Love you guys!

Office nomads unite in ‘coworking’ spaces
Tired of the home office? Shared office spaces, for rent by the day or the month, are popping up all over.
By Matthew Amster-Burton
December 26 2007: 11:24 AM EST

SEATTLE (FORTUNE Small Business) — As a sole proprietor who works primarily online, every day I face a painful decision: work from home or go to a coffeehouse? Working from home is awesome. No boss hanging over your shoulder. No need to shower. No human contact. No incentive to stay on task. The coffeehouse comes with its own challenges. Over caffeination. No place to make phone calls without being a jerk. Nowhere to meet with clients. You have to buy lunch.

Marketing consultant Chris Haddad has found a third option: coworking. Every weekday he heads to Office Nomads, a shared office space in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle. For $475 a month, Haddad gets a permanent desk space (he’s bought his own snazzy stand-up desk), unlimited coffee and printing, 24-hour access, Wi-Fi and use of three conference rooms. He also gets some friendly coworkers who happen not to work for the same company.

“I’ve been self-employed for four years now,” Haddad said. “It’s a lot of fun, I like doing it, but the walls close in really fast. There were several times where I realized I hadn’t put on pants or left the house in 30 hours.”

Haddad is Office Nomads’ first and, for now, only monthly member. “When I was first here, it was like, wow! It’s all the good things about having an office, which are coworkers, a separate place to go, more space,” Haddad said. “But there’s nobody standing over your shoulder making sure you’re not checking personal e-mail.”

Haddad also has a place to meet clients other than his small condo. When I drop by on a Wednesday morning, Haddad is in the conference room with a client. At a nearby desk is Eric Von Blom, who works remotely for an Arizona telecom.

“It was good for my relationship to come here,” he said. “I’d rather talk to these wonderful, freaky people than my wonderful, freaky cats.”

Von Blom gets free office space in exchange for being the Nomads’ office manager. Other regulars, mostly Web developers and copywriters, pay $20 for a day pass.

Coworking is a growing phenomenon – an online map of coworking spaces lists about three dozen spaces worldwide, most of which went into business in the last two years. One of the market’s earliest pioneers was Nutopia Workspace (named 116 West Houston until a recent move) in New York City, which opened in 2001.

Nutopia now has 300 members paying rates from $100 per month for a “virtual” presence (a mailing address and actual office use up to two days per month) to $800 for all-inclusive full-time access. On any given day, up to 40 members will be in the office, according to founder John McGann. He estimates that around a third of his clientele is small-business owners; the rest are freelancers and out-of-town workers who need an occasional Manhattan presence.

Nutopia was recently forced out of its longtime space by rising rents – a problem that, ironically, McGann expects to ultimately benefit his business.

“The rise in commercial rents is really hitting small businesses the hardest,” he said. “My rent doubled. Because of price hikes like that, more people are becoming familiar with coworking.”

Office Nomads’ office is a large, open-plan space in a pedestrian-oriented district of Seattle. It’s airy and bright, with exposed brick and a typical startup feel. There are no cubes or office doors. Conversation is encouraged.

“Somebody pops their head up, usually everybody’s heads pop up and everybody has this fun, random discussion, whether it’s talking about Britney Spears or talking about marketing,” said Office Nomads founder Susan Evans, 26.

Evans and Jacob Sayles, 30, opened Office Nomads in November with their own investment capital. They’re also clients – both have other jobs and work on them from Office Nomads. Sayles telecommutes to a software developer and wanted a way to avoid home-office isolation. Evans works for an environmental nonprofit and was drawn to the idea of coworking as a commute-trip reduction strategy.

“Seattle talks a lot about their congestion problems,” she said. “Wouldn’t it be great if there were a way that people could telecommute and have it be efficient, effective, and not a burden to them?”

The space has four work zones, including a very quiet one known as The Cave, which is good for private calls. Unlike at a coffeehouse, however, it’s no breach of etiquette at Office Nomads to make phone calls. You can also shower at Office Nomads, an activity discouraged at most coffeehouses.

It would be hard to quantify the annual revenue of the nascent coworking market. Office Nomads itself has a long way to go before turning a profit.

“To stop hemorrhaging money, we need about 25 monthly members,” Evans said. “We can start paying both Jacob and me a meager salary at about 32 members.” The space maxes out at 40 members.

Evans has found that the benefits of coworking go well beyond getting people out of their cars. “It’s about having a work community and being around people who are also interested and inspired.”

I’m not ready to give up the coffeehouse just yet: $475/month is a lot of money. But on days when I have a lot of phone calls to make and a seductive pile of laundry at home, I’ll come back to Office Nomads for the $20 day pass. When I ask Evans how to connect to the network printer, she hands me a USB drive and quips, “You can’t bring a printer to a coffeehouse.”

In my recovery uniform playing with Dad’s new laptop
(Still can’t wear pants b/c I’m too swollen/it’s too painful, so I spend my days in dad’s old bathrobe)

This morning I’m actually doing okay. Still very much feeling pain, but it’s the best it’s been so far. Whereas yesterday was actually some of the worst it’s been so far. Sunday I started bleeding (it still continues). Tuesday and Wednesday I started feeling dizziness and nauseousness. Last night I was running a slight fever. This morning I’ve already taken two pain killers and I’m actually feeling okay. Pain still, yes, but okay, and much better than yesterday. Let’s hear it for the little things!

Let’s also hear it for the beautiful people. Some weeks I don’t feel worthy to be surrounded by such impressive, generous friends. The cards, calls, and gifts continue. My thankfulness and tears continue too. Yesterday Chris came over to keep my company and while he was here he delivered the most generous gift ever: he and Alyssa gave me their perfect condition Nikon D50. For as much as I love photography as a hobby, I’ve never actually owned an SLR… not film or digital. And now this week they decide to give me their D50 when they upgraded Chris’s camera. I think I’m about the luckiest girl ever with the most impressive friends ever! They’re totally, amazingly way too generous and I’m thankful to have them as friends for so long (has it really been 12 years?!). Continuing the amazing, impressive, and generous friends line… today I received flowers from the fabulously beautiful and talented Samantha! How incredibly sweet to send beautiful lilies and roses. We’re both in different places in life these days and I can’t reiterate enough how thankful I am to have Samantha in my life again back in Seattle!

I should add to this list because it keeps growing as people go overboard with their generosity. I’m just thankful for the well wishes and casserole offers… gifts beyond that are entirely unexpected and proof that my friends are generally too generous. :)

• Stef brought me a stack of three books and some fabulous chocolate chip cookies because she’s incredibly sweet like that and because she loves me! I’m excited she’ll be back in Austin before I leave for Seattle.
• Jess sent silly cards and sent a gift too… books from Amazon! She continues to look out for me, even from a distance. Thanks Jess!
• Sameer also sent flowers yesterday! I got out of the shower and saw the flower box and though “oh, hadn’t I already put away the flower box from Samantha?” And then I realized that Sameer had also sent flowers and that they must’ve arrived just an hour or two after Samantha’s. Sameer rocks… not just for visiting me in Kenya, but also for sending threatening messages to me on my get well soon card.
• Janette and Fred also sent their card and a sweet gift… and I do mean sweet. The soy candle they sent is perhaps the sweetest, best smelling candle I’ve ever owned! Thanks so much for thinking of me y’all!

And in even better news than gift news, last night I slept through the night for the first time since the surgery! Halleluia! I’d say that’s a good sign of feeling a bit better. Life is good!

One of the best “get well soon” emails from recent days:

Get plenty of rest and drink lots of gin. You’ll be up and around in no time. I once had tuberculosis and cured it by drinking two cases of scotch while sitting in a navajo sweat lodge.

Buck up,
xxx

Did I mention it was from one of my employees? Totally great!

My heart is breaking for Kenya during the aftermath of last week’s elections.

NY Times says: “The dubious conclusion of the most fiercely fought election in Kenya’s history has produced a wave of ethnic fighting. After three days of rioting, some streets in Nairobi are beginning to look like war zones, with trucks of soldiers rumbling through a wasteland of burned cars and abandoned homes, their tires crunching over broken glass. Gangs of young men have built roadblocks between the neighborhoods of the Kikuyus, Mr. Kibaki’s tribe, and those of the Luos, the tribe of Raila Odinga, the top opposition leader, who narrowly lost the election. The nomad’s land between them is often a single lane of potholed asphalt, patrolled by thugs with huge rocks in their hands. In some areas, witnesses said that mobs were stopping cars, pulling out passengers and demanding identification cards to determine whether they were Kikuyu (one can often tell by the name). If so, they were killed.”

I read that paragraph and I can picture it so clearly in my head. It makes my eyes tear right up. By “some streets” in Nairobi, I suspect they are probably referring to River Road, streets in Kibera, streets in Mathare, and maybe even Racecourse Road. I remember some fighting last year over street vendors when I was taking a taxi from the Akamba to Racecourse. There were people running in the streets down River Road, gun shots going off on either side of our vehicle, police unloading from trucks, running after them in their riot gear. I remember Cindy and I passing a burning matatu on River Road last December when Mungiki was on a killing rampage. Even with my own proximity to occasional violence, I think Kenya’s generally considered more stable than many/most African countries. However, if the media portrayal is anywhere near accurate, I imagine this week’s post election violence could be ten times scarier than Mungiki or street fighting. And I imagine it’s much more widespread too since it’s happening in slums, in Nairobi, and in other towns around the country.

I’m sad to think Kenya might become one of those unstable countries… one where the president rigs elections and the opposition plans coups and everything becomes scary and unreliable and the nation isn’t any better than a common thug of a country. Most Kenyans are proud and peaceful people, but it sounds like there’s more proof of Kibaki rigging the votes to win his re-election. NYT says “European Union observers said Kenya’s election commission ignored undeniable evidence of vote rigging to keep the government in power.” And it doesn’t sound like Odinga or the opposition supporters are going to give up very easily. Latest reports say over 135 are dead, riots are continuing across the country, and there’s even been a curfew imposed in some places. And Kibaki’s government took steps toward martial law on Sunday night when they banned all live media broadcasts. Wow.

If you’ve got any energy in you this evening for something in addition to drinks and NYE celebrations, please think kind thoughts for Kenya and hope a peaceful resolution comes with the start of the new year.